[00:00:02] Hello, my name is Sally Moriarty-Flask. Welcome to: From His Word to Our Hearts, my weekly Bible Study podcast. Together we will explore the readings to be proclaimed at the Catholic Mass on Sunday, December 28, 2025, the Feast of the Holy Family of Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.
This week's episode is entitled: Building Better Families. And this week's Gospel reminds us that every family faces adversity at some point, even the Holy Family. Difficulties and challenges are part of life, and our family's success doesn't rest on whether or not we encounter difficult situations, but on how we weather the storms they bring.
As we journey through the readings this week, consider the following:
Our human families will never match the holiness of the Holy Family… nevertheless, Jesus, Mary, and Joseph still provide an example for us to follow. They can still teach us how to be better people and better families. So, how do we learn from them and become better?
[00:01:19] Let's begin in prayer:
In the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen.
Heavenly Father, we praise you and we thank you for the gifts you give us every day, but most especially for the gift of family. May we be ever mindful of the love you have for us so that we can share that love with every member of our family, be they near or far. We ask this through Christ our Lord. Amen.
In the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Amen.
[00:01:50] Now that we've opened our hearts in prayer, let's listen to what God is telling us in the Scriptures.
Our Gospel this week is from Matthew 2: 13-15, 19-23.
“When [the Magi] had departed, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said, ‘Rise, take the child and his mother, and flee to Egypt, and remain there till I tell you; for Herod is about to search for the child, to destroy him.’ And he rose and took the child and his mother by night, and departed to Egypt, and remained there until the death of Herod. This was to fulfil what the Lord had spoken by the prophet, ‘Out of Egypt I have called my son.’ But when Herod died, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared in a dream to Joseph in Egypt, saying, ‘Rise, take the child and his mother, and go to the land of Israel, for those who sought the child's life are dead.’ And he rose and took the child of his mother, and went to the land of Israel. But when he heard that Archela’us reigned over Judea in place of his father Herod, [Joseph] was afraid to go there, and being warned in a dream he withdrew to the district of Galilee. And he went and dwelt in a city called Nazareth, that what was spoken by the prophets might be fulfilled, ‘He shall be called a Nazarene.’”
The Feast of the Holy Family is assigned to the Sunday in between the Solemnity of the Nativity, the birth of Jesus (which is December 25), and the Solemnity of Mary, Mother of God, (which is January 1). However, if both of those Solemnities fall on Sundays, meaning that there is no Sunday in between the two - then the Feast of the Holy Family is observed on December 30. This year, neither one of those fall on a Sunday so there is a Sunday in between the two. And that will be when we celebrate the Feast of the Holy Family.
[00:04:07] And if we are truly honest with ourselves, we have to admit that we all too often try to compare our totally human families to the Holy Family and we really shouldn't… so, instead of comparing ourselves to the Holy Family, we should realize that the Holy Family IS our family! Mary is the biological mother of Jesus, but she is our mother too. Jesus told us that as he was dying on the Cross in John's Gospel. Jesus, through the Sacrament of our Baptism, is our adopted brother. And Joseph was not only the protector and guide of Mary and Jesus, but - as the patron saint of fathers and families - he is our protector and guide as well.
Now, if we think back to last week, the 4th Sunday of Advent, we heard the first of Joseph's four dreams… and I said then that we would hear the rest of them this week - and that is our Gospel in Cycle A for this Feast. During the other Liturgical Cycles, we hear from Luke on the Feast of the Holy Family, since his Gospel is the only other one to include Infancy Narratives. Last year in Cycle C, we heard the finding of the child Jesus in the Temple… and next year in Cycle B, we'll read about the Presentation in the Temple.
[00:05:43] This story from Matthew, however, focuses on Joseph, his dreams, and the events they initiate. And because Matthew wrote primarily to Jewish Christians, dreams feature prominently in his Gospel, as they do in the Old Testament. Think of Abraham, Jacob, and Joseph experiencing dreams… and Joseph and Daniel interpreting dreams. Dreams were highly significant to the Jewish people because they were often how God communicated with specific individuals - and these dreams are certainly no exception. Every dream Joseph had played a crucial role in the life of Jesus by ensuring that he reached adulthood so that he could then carry out the will of his Heavenly Father and complete the very mission for which he became Incarnate.
So, let's listen as Matthew recounts the remaining three dreams of Joseph…
“When [the Magi}”
Of course, those are the wise men from the east that had followed the star to find a newborn king; we hear their story on the feast of the Epiphany.
“When [the Magi] had departed, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream”
Joseph is the head of the Holy Family and, as such, is responsible for the well-being of every member of his family… everyone entrusted to his care. That is why the angel appears to Joseph. This is - remember - his second dream.
“[the angel] said, ‘Rise, take the child and his mother, and flee to Egypt, and remain there till I tell you;’”
[00:07:46] Egypt was a place where Jews frequently sought refuge. At the time of Jesus’ birth (which historians now date to between 6 and 4 BC), there was still a thriving Jewish community in the city of Alexandria. But why did the angel tell Joseph to take his family and flee?
“for Herod is about to search for the child, to destroy him.”
[00:08:17] Herod was so furious that the Magi did not return and tell him where to find Jesus that he ordered the death of all male children in Bethlehem under the age of two… which has come to be known as the Massacre of the Holy Innocents. It was Herod's way of eliminating what he perceived to be a threat to his reign. Now many sources doubt the historicity of this event - only Macrobius (5th century Roman author) wrote about it aside from Matthew's Scriptural account. There is no solid historical evidence to indicate that this event actually took place… history is just very quiet on that matter.
Herod was, however, vicious and ruthless, famously executing not only his enemies, but his friends and family as well. So, an action such as this would certainly not have been outside the realm of the possible for Herod.
[00:09:31] I will include pictures on my Instagram account this week of the Church of Saint Catherine (which is actually where Midnight Mass is celebrated in Bethlehem), as well as the Chapel of Saint Joseph and the Chapel of the Holy Innocents - also in Bethlehem. One other interesting photo that I will include is of what is called the Stone of Concealment. And that is where - tradition has it - Elizabeth hid her son, John, from Herod's soldiers. And yes, that is the child who became - as an adult - John the Baptist.
“And [Joseph] rose and took the child and his mother by night, and departed to Egypt, and remained there until the death of Herod.”
We know, from the historical record, that Herod died in 4 BC, which means that the Holy Family spent anywhere from a few months to two years in Egypt.
“This was to fulfil what the Lord had spoken by the prophet, ‘Out of Egypt I have called my son.’”
[00:10:51] That quote is from Hosea 11, which points directly to the Exodus, but which Matthew uses here to point to Jesus.
“But when Herod died, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared in a dream to Joseph in Egypt,”
If you're keeping count, this is now Joseph's third dream.
“saying, ‘Rise, take the child and his mother, and go to the land of Israel, for those who sought the child's life are dead.’”
Meaning primarily Herod the Great. And notice the angel says to Joseph “THOSE who sought the child's life” … because, of course, Herod would have issued all the orders regarding Jesus and the Massacre of the Holy Innocents, but he would not have undertaken any direct action himself… he would have left that up to his advisors, other members of his court, and the soldiers that actually carried out Herod's orders.
[00:12:03] “And [Joseph] rose and took the child and his mother, and went to the land of Israel.”
In other words, they went home.
“But when he heard that Archela’us reigned over Judea in place of his father Herod, he was afraid to go there,”
Archelaus was one of the sons of Herod the Great - and he not only reigned over Judea, but over Samaria and Idumea as well. I have a map that I will include on my Instagram post this week showing these regions, as well as the region of Galilee and the cities of Nazareth, Jerusalem and Bethlehem, just so that we can more easily orient ourselves geographically to what the Gospel is talking about.
[00:12:51] “and being warned in a dream”
Again, if you're keeping track, that is now Joseph's fourth dream.
“he withdrew to the district of Galilee.”
Which put Joseph and his family completely outside the reach of Archelaus.
“And he went and dwelt in a city called Nazareth, that what was spoken by the prophets might be fulfilled, ‘He shall be called a Nazarene.’”
While there is no single prophetic book in the Old Testament where we can find that exact quote, nevertheless, Matthew clearly felt that detail was important enough to include in his Gospel, so Scripture scholars have developed theories that attempt to explain that. And notice Matthew says, spoken by the prophets… prophets – plural!
[00:13:53] One theory suggests that Matthew paraphrased several Old Testament prophets to create a summary statement, if you will, about the Messiah. Building on that premise, another theory then suggests that Matthew was using a play on words to complete the point he was making. Different prophets refer to the Messiah as a branch or shoot. In fact, we heard that from Isaiah 11 on the 2nd Sunday of Advent. But we can also find it in Isaiah 53 (which is one of the Suffering Servant Songs), as well as Zechariah 3 & 6 and Jeremiah 23. Now the Hebrew word for shoot or branch is nē·tzer, which forms part of that wordplay. The other part comes from the Hebrew word for Nazareth, which is Netzarit, meaning City of the Branch. That gives us two words then, that not only sound similar but also share similar meaning nē·tzer and Netzarit. So - the thinking goes - that Matthew used those words to make his point that the Messiah was to come from Nazareth.
[00:15:25] The difficulties that the Holy Family encountered here in this passage from Matthew remind us that no family is immune from adversity. Adversity, though, shouldn't be what defines a family. What should define a family is whatever makes it better… kindness, patience, acceptance, understanding, compassion, forgiveness, and love. So, let's do our best to practice all of those characteristics so that we can be better… better people, better parents, better children, and better siblings. Because if we are all better as individuals, we will be better families.
[00:16:23] That takes us to our First Reading, which is from Sirach 3: 2-6, 12-14.
“The Lord sets the father in honor above the children, and he confirmed the right of the mother over her sons.
Whoever honors his father atones for sins, and preserves himself from them. When he prays, he is heard; and whoever glorifies his mother is like one who lays up treasure. Whoever honors his father will be gladdened by his own children, and when he prays he will be heard. Whoever glorifies his father will have a long life, and whoever obeys the Lord will refresh his mother; O son, help your father in his old age, and do not grieve him as long as he lives; even if he is lacking in understanding, show forbearance; and do not despise him all the days of his life. For kindness to a father will not be forgotten, and against your sins it will be credited to you.”
[00:17:38] Sirach is part of the Wisdom Literature in the Old Testament - it is part of the canon of Scripture for Catholic and Orthodox Christians, it is included in the Septuagint (the earliest Greek translation of the Hebrew Bible), but it is not in the Hebrew Bible itself… likely because of the relatively late date of its composition. Sirach is part of what is called the Apocrypha (or the Disputed Books) and is considered non-canonical by most Protestant traditions.
Sirach was written in the 2nd century BC in Biblical Hebrew and later translated into Greek. Interestingly enough, the original Hebrew text was lost somewhere around 400 AD and not rediscovered until around 1900. During those 1500 years, the only surviving text was in Greek. The author is Yeshua Ben Sira, who was a well-educated Jew, a teacher, and a scribe. And his book is a collection of wisdom sayings and ethical teachings that most closely resembles the book of Proverbs.
This week's passage is essentially a commentary on the commandment to “Honor thy Father and Mother” … and Jewish tradition held that honoring one's parents was directly related to honoring God. Or, to put it another way, when we build up the quality of our human familiar familial relationships, that ultimately leads us to develop a greater reverence for God. Right relations between husbands and wives, parents and children, the young and the old, the rich and the poor, will help us learn to be in right relation with God. That creates sort of a continuous loop almost. When we're in right relation with God, we are strengthened to be in better relation with each other… and being in better relation with each other teaches us to be in right relation with God. That behavior constantly reinforces itself.
[00:20:16] So, let's listen in to what Yeshua Ben Sira has to say…
“The Lord sets the father in honor above the children, and he confirmed the right of the mother over her sons.”
Again, Jewish tradition directly connects honoring God with God's command to honor our parents. Or, if we look at that from the other side of the coin, when we are disrespectful to our earthly parents, then we are also being disrespectful to God.
“Whoever honors his father atones for sins, and preserves himself from them.”
Atonement for sins was typically sought through temple sacrifice, but Sirach says that honoring our parents - which is a simple act of kindness - also atones for sins… and not only that but is even akin to developing a virtue. And remember, a virtue is a habit of doing good. So, developing virtues (or good habits) protect us from developing bad habits. That's what Sirach means by “preserves himself from sins.”
“When he prays, he is heard;”
[00:21:52] Sirach is echoing Proverbs 15, which says: “The LORD hears the prayers of the righteous.” In other words, if we honor our parents - we honor God - and God, in turn, will look kindly upon our prayers.
“and whoever glorifies his mother is like one who lays up treasure.”
This is one of those instances where I really don't like the RSV translation. A better translation would be respects… and the NAB actually translates that as respects… “whoever respects his mother.” Now, Sirach is not promising that you'll have a huge bank account if you honor your mother… remember, we always have to understand Scripture in context. And the context - from the first half of that sentence - has to do with prayer. So, Sirach isn't promising a huge bank account; he is, however, promising treasure in heaven.
“Whoever honors his father will be gladdened by his own children,”
That's sort of a what-goes-around-comes-around kind of situation. In other words, the one who honors his father will in turn be honored by his own children.
“and when he prays he will be heard.”
We explored that phrase just a couple of verses ago. Remember, it's an echo of Proverbs 15, which says, “The LORD hears the prayers of the righteous.”
[00:23:39] Whoever glorifies his father will have a long life,”
Again, I really dislike the RSV translation… a better translation is honors - whoever honors his father. And the reward there is the blessing of a long life.
“and whoever obeys the Lord will refresh his mother;”
That is a very strange phrase… but “refresh his mother” essentially means will give his mother no cause for worry.
“O son, help your father in his old age,”
Notice, the text here shifts from attitude to action… from having an attitude that demonstrates respect for one's father to the concrete action of assisting or caring for one's father. And this doesn't just mean old age - it can also mean illness, loneliness, distress, or disability. And I think, in our modern society, factors other than age may actually be more important than age alone and often require a much greater level of intentionality.
“and do not grieve him as long as he lives;”
What Sirach means is that we shouldn't cause our father's grief - we shouldn't be disrespectful, disobedient, angry, or cruel. But remember, this all goes back to what I said earlier. Jewish tradition held that honoring one's parents was directly related to honoring God… so, right relations between parents and children help us learn to be in right relation with God. And I also want to point out this should not be a one-way street! If a son shouldn't cause his father grief, then a father shouldn't cause his son grief.
Sirach then goes on…
“even if he is lacking in understanding, show forbearance;”
The NAB translates that as: “even if his mind fails.” That's a bit harsh, but it certainly helps us get the message. So, even when we are most challenged by our parents - and we've all been in those situations - when respect becomes most difficult… consideration, patience, tolerance, restraint, and compassion should be our response. And again, that must go both ways!
“and do not despise him all the days of his life.”
The NAB translates that as: “do not revile him because you are in your prime.” And let's face it… as we get older, we slow down - physically and cognitively - we are less resilient, less adaptable, we take fewer risks… but we also have a wealth of experience and knowledge to accompany the gray hairs and wrinkles we're accumulating. So, those who are in their prime should be more tolerant of those who aren't - and I cannot stress this enough - that has to go both ways! Those who are older and more experienced should be more patient with those who are younger and have less experience.
“For kindness to a father will not be forgotten, and against your sins it will be credited to you.”
The NAB translates that as: ‘it will serve as a sin offering.” Now, Leviticus devotes an entire chapter (chapter 4, to be exact), to Sin Offerings, so I won't even attempt to summarize all of that information here… suffice it to say, sin offerings were required temple sacrifices that atoned for sins that a person had committed AND cleansed that person from the defilement of their sin.
[00:29:01] Sirach is suggesting here that the simple act of being kind to one's father - and not just fathers, by the way, mothers as well - being kind to one's parents will be as efficacious as a sin offering in the temple. That's quite a promise! But it also signals a change in attitude, a change in Jewish teaching regarding atonement… that acts of kindness - not just kindness to one's parents - but acts of generosity (meaning almsgiving) and acts of forgiveness, will also come to serve as acts of atonement for sin.
This passage focuses heavily on the connection, in Jewish tradition, between honoring one's parents and honoring God - or, conversely, being disrespectful to God when we are disrespectful to our earthly parents. So, how do we incorporate that into our modern way of thinking? It always comes back to the question of… what makes us better people and choosing to do that.
And when we put it that way… it suddenly becomes very easy to choose between what makes us better and what doesn't. If the choice is between honor and disrespect - we have to choose honor… every time. If the choice is between kindness and cruelty - we have to choose kindness. If the choice is between love and hatred - as Christians, we have to choose love… every time. Our choice always has to be whatever makes us better… better people, better parents, better children, and better siblings… because being better in each one of those roles will make us better families.
[00:31:56] That takes us to our Responsorial Psalm, which is Psalm 128, and the refrain is:
“Blessed are those who fear the LORD and walk in his ways.”
And here are the verses:
“Blessed is every one who fears the LORD, who walks in his ways! You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands; you shall be happy, and it shall be well with you.”
“Your wife will be like a fruitful vine within your house; your children will be like olive shoots around your table.”
“Behold, thus shall the man be blessed who fears the LORD. The LORD bless you from Zion! May you see the prosperity of Jerusalem all the days of your life!”
This Psalm is an Ascent Psalm (which are Psalms 120 to 134), but it also has one of the characteristics of a Wisdom Psalm. Now remember, Ascent Psalms were typically recited by pilgrims on their way to Jerusalem - and themes of God's blessing, his graciousness, and his gift of peace are common themes in Ascent Psalms.
[00:33:16] This Psalm talks about the blessings of rich harvests, prosperity, and large families with many children - all common themes in Ascent Psalms. And while there are several characteristic themes in Wisdom Psalms as well, the one we really encounter here is the theme of profound respect and reverence for God - what the Psalmist calls: “fear of the Lord” - and we see that Wisdom theme throughout this Psalm. And of course, the talk of the blessings of children and family are why this Psalm was chosen for this Feast.
[00:34:05] That leads us to our Second Reading, which is from Colossians 3: 12-21.
There is both a shorter and longer version of this reading. They both begin at the same place, so I'll let you know when we reach the end of the shorter version.
“[Brothers and Sisters:] Put on then as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassion, kindness, lowliness, meekness, and patience, forbearing one another and if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in the one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, as you teach and admonish one another in all wisdom, and as you sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.”
That is where the shorter version of this reading ends. I don't know what you will hear in your home parishes this weekend, but I truly hope you hear the entirety of this reading. The next section can be a bit challenging, but it's something that we need to hear and understand!
“Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them. Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.”
[00:36:30] We had several passages from Colossians last summer, and I shared with you a lot about the debate that surrounds it at that time. You may remember that I said Colossians can be classified as either a Captivity Letter (written by Paul in prison) or an Occasional Letter (written to refute a doctrine that was simply known as “The Philosophy”). I also said that some scholars believe Paul to be the author, while others think it may have been Timothy or another of Paul's disciples - but written with Paul's input. Some scholars suggest that the theology is way too advanced for Paul, while others say the unique situation Paul addressed accounts for the difference. And finally, some contend that this letter was written as early as 50 AD while others suggest it may not have been written until closer to 80 AD. That is a lot of controversy swirling around one - relatively short - letter.
But here are some things we can say with some amount of certainty… Paul probably did actually write this letter, and he identifies himself as the author - not once, but twice. So, if we do accept that Paul is the author, then we can conclude that he wrote this letter during his first imprisonment in Rome… because Paul says that his friends are with him and the runaway slave Onesimus (whom we know from the letter to Philemon) has just been sent back to his owner… and we know those circumstances all took place during Paul's first imprisonment, which then dates this letter to around 60 - 62 AD. Besides addressing the situation in Colossae, this letter accomplishes two other purposes… it bridges Paul's own ministry of preaching and teaching with the ministry of those who will follow after him AND it serves as a model for the defense of the Christian faith (what is now called Apologetics). In this particular passage, Paul is teaching his audience how to live as faithful followers of Jesus. So, let's listen in…
“[Brothers and Sisters:] Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved,”
[00:39:23] The Christian faithful have a special relationship with Christ because, remember, that is precisely what Christianity is all about… having a relationship with Jesus, knowing and loving Jesus. But that relationship also provides a number of gifts from the Father that enable all of us to follow the teachings of Jesus - if we choose to do so… if we choose to accept those gifts AND live as Jesus taught us to live. You may be asking, what exactly are those gifts? Well, Paul gives us a list…
“compassion, kindness, lowliness, meekness, and patience, forbearing one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other;”
That is quite a list. But remember, those are the behaviors that are supposed to identify us as Christians… they should define how we think and act every day! And notice something else… nowhere in that list does Paul say God gives us the gift of always being right, of always getting our own way, he doesn't say it's okay to hold a grudge, blame others, or hate any group of people… NONE of those behaviors are included in that list! Unfortunately, they seem to be way too common in our society today, but they aren't Christian. And when Paul says forgive each other - he adds a condition to that!
“as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.”
[00:41:44] Not only has Paul set a very high bar… his statement doesn't allow for any wiggle room, nor is there any way to negotiate a less demanding condition. Paul says: as the Lord has forgiven us, we also MUST forgive others. Not should… must! Meaning we show our gratitude to God for his forgiveness of us by extending his forgiveness to others! Or, looking at that another way, we must forgive others in order to be forgiven ourselves. After all, it's God's forgiveness that we're extending. We don't have the right to put limits on it. And isn't that also precisely what we say in the Lord's Prayer? Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us - in that prayer which Jesus himself taught us to pray - we ask God to extend his mercy to us in the same manner that we are willing to extend mercy to others. Jesus sets a high bar for us in the Lord's Prayer… Paul echoes that here in Colossians. Neither man ever said that such behavior would be easy - just that it would be possible! And not only possible, but necessary! Then Paul says…
“above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.”
Love is THE crowning virtue in the Christian life - the one that ties everything else together and allows us to exist in perfect harmony.
“And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts,”
The same peace of Christ that forgave sinners, that gave sight to the blind, that restored health to those who were physically or mentally ill… the same peace that helped the poor and the needy - that is the type of peace that should rule in our hearts. Not divisiveness, not anger, not hatred, not greed, not resentment, not prejudice… but the true peace of Christ!
“to which indeed you were called in the one body.”
By one body, Paul means the Church - the Mystical Body of Christ.
“And be thankful.”
So many times we forget that, don't we? We think about it when someone does us a favor… we think about it when we receive a gift… but we don't think about offering it every single day… to God - and we should! Every day that we begin a new day of life… that is a gift from God and one for which we should be thankful.
“Let the Word of Christ dwell in you richly,”
[00:45:50] And Paul means all the words of Christ - the entirety of his teachings… not just the ones we like, not just the ones we agree with, not just the ones that are easy, but all of them! Jesus' teachings should inform everything that we do; they should shape every part of our lives, every action we take, every word that comes out of our mouth.
“as you teach and admonish one another in all wisdom,”
By those words, Paul does not mean that each of us has to be a professional teacher, a preacher, an author, or a scholar. He means that we should teach and admonish one another by living good Christian lives.
“and as you sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs with thankfulness in your hearts to God.”
Honoring God with music and song is a tradition that dates back centuries - to the worship of ancient Israel. Music in Christian liturgy is not something new and different… it is found throughout the Old Testament and has continued to be part of worship down through the ages. And we often forget that simple detail.
So, Paul is saying essentially that all of those things are related… all part of letting the word of God dwell within us! They are not things that are imposed upon us by others. They are things God expects from us. And that thankfulness, that joyful, musical worship, should all be things we are honored to give him in return.
“And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.”
[00:48:25] This is where the shorter version of this reading ends. And what Paul just described is how we pray… to the Father, through the Son, and in the power of the Holy Spirit.
The next part of this passage often appears controversial to us because it is grossly misunderstood. The next four sentences are what would have been called in biblical times a Household Code. And - at their heart - they are about respect! Not control, but respect!
“Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.”
Notice Paul qualifies his statement with the words: “as is fitting in the Lord.” This isn't saying that women shouldn't be strong or independent - they most certainly should. But those qualities must be tempered by respect… all those qualities are essential in a marriage. And remember, in biblical times, women were seen as property. Paul, however, is suggesting a new paradigm… a loving partnership between spouses of equal dignity. And that has to be mutual!
“Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.”
Meaning that husbands should love their wives in a respectful and dignified manner.
“Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.”
[00:50:12] That takes us back to Exodus 20, when God gave the commandments to the people at Mount Sinai… and which connects to our passage from Sirach. And the command to honor one's father and mother is a commandment that comes with the promise of blessing to those who observe it. Exodus 20 says: “Honor your father and mother that you may have a long life.” So, longevity is God's promise to those who honor their parents.
I would be remiss if I did not mention that not all parents are good parents… there are parents that act in dishonorable ways, there are parents who are abusive and cruel. Those are not the type of parents that God says you need to respect and honor. Again, this street goes both ways! Actions that come from parents should be loving, respectful, honorable, and good, so that the actions that children give in return are loving, honorable, respectful, and good. Paul finishes this passage with the following…
“Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.”
Out of all four of the sentences in this last part of the passage, this is the only warning! Meaning all parents shouldn't do anything to discourage their children. That goes back to what I said about the actions of parents being loving, honorable, respectful and good! Parents shouldn't impose unreasonable discipline… they should not impose unnecessary restraint or excessive punishment. Parents SHOULD teach moral and ethical behavior, but more importantly, they should live it themselves… and thereby instill such behaviors into their children - along with all the other things children need to learn from their parents to become responsible adults - as well as how to be loving, respectful, and encouraging. Paul is challenging every Christian household to be transformed by the peace of Christ and so be filled - in all of their relationships - with the things that make each of us better people.
Difficulties and challenges are part of life, and every family faces adversity… but how we weather challenges and how we face adversity is what can make us better. Being part of a family should mean being safe, accepted, nurtured, and protected. Family should be a place where we are loved – unconditionally! A place where we can make mistakes and be forgiven – unconditionally, where we can disagree and still be respected – unconditionally! Not everyone grows up in that type of a situation. The greatest blessing of this Feast is that it reminds us of who and what we SHOULD be so that we can always try to do better!
Our families will never be as holy as the Holy Family - but if we remember that the Holy Family IS our family - then we know that all we have to do is ask and they will give us: compassion, kindness, humility, patience, tolerance, forgiveness, faithfulness, and - most importantly – love! All the qualities we need to be better… better people AND better families.
[00:54:25] If you'd like to reach out to me with questions or comments, send me an email at
[email protected]
Thank you for spending this time with me and until next we meet, may God shower his blessings upon you like a soft and gentle rain, and may he hold you - safe and secure - in the palm of his hand.
From His Word to Our Hearts is produced by SFS Audio Solutions.
The content of the show was assembled by me, Sally Moriarty-Flask.
Our music was composed by Jimmy Flask and is used with the permission of the composer. All rights reserved.
Information regarding references used in preparing the exegesis for this podcast is available upon request.
Thank you for listening. Have a safe and happy New Year celebration and God bless.
